RAIDERS SLICE UP PUMPKIN PIE; BRONCOS GET LUCKY IN OT
The Broncos are apparently the greatest team in
football. Well, that must be the case right? After
all, great teams win ugly, and these two wins have
been some of the ugliest wins in Broncos history. As
happy as we are to escape with a win today, let's not
start making room for the Lombardi Trophy just yet.
The fact that the Broncos had to ESCAPE with a win IN
MILE HIGH against JOSH MCCLOWN AND THE RAIDERS coupled
with last week's near-disaster against the Bills
should start the sirens blaring. Is this team really
ready for Indianapolis and San Diego in its current
state? Is Jason Elam, the Broncos' most consistent
asset for the past thirteen years, starting to lose
it? Is "Pumpkin Pie" Jay Cutler going to show the
weapons he flashed late in 2007 or is he regressing?
These questions aren't answered yet, luckily. Let's
start with the opponents. Buffalo and Oakland are
supposed to be slightly improved from last year, but
let's face it, they are still two "bottom-five" NFL
teams--perhaps only the Chiefs and Falcons are worse,
although the Saints and Giants seem to have suddenly
degraded to the bottom of the pack as well. Yet the
Raiders not only put up a fight, they had the Broncos
on the ropes and almost got the kill. If Janokowski's
kick is eight inches to the left, the Broncos lose.
Thankfully, Janokowski has become one of the most
inconsistent kickers in the league and did what he
does best after Shanahan's time-out froze him up. But
the Raiders came REAL close at mile high, and let's
not be blinded by Cutler's magical non-touchdown drive
and Elam's kick at the gun The Bills would have won
last week if they hadn't poorly managed the clock.
The Broncos aren't very far removed from an 0-2 start.
But they won both of those games because of Jason
Elam. Or perhaps despite Elam? He missed two big
ones last week and another today in primo kicking
conditions. If he gets over these jitters, then it's
all good, but God forbid the Broncos have to start
worrying about yet another position. We'll give Elam
credit for not shanking the two game-winners, but
then, if he'd made the ones he missed, the games would
never have been on the line to begin with.
So how does Pumpkin Pie figure into all this? Well,
if you can see the name of the website, you know where
we're going here. Once again, the Broncos were forced
to ride the defense to victory. Although 'Dre Bly got
fooled badly by Jerry Porter for a score, the Broncos
held the Raider offense for the most part. Meanwhile,
between a safety and two picks--one turning into the
TD that gave the Raiders a late lead--Pumkpin Pie
single-handedly spotted Oakland nine points and did
little in overtime except let Big Baby Daddy run the
ball down the tired Raiders' throats.
"But we got the win, right?" say the Pumpkin Pie Fans.
Hey, isn't the the kind of game that got the Snake
treated like Osama Bin Plummer? Poor stats and a win
thanks to the D and some pixie dust? Are the
hypocrites going to point to this as some sort of huge
improvement over last season? The Broncos are still
relying too heavily on the secondary to cover up the
front line's mistakes and Cutler has had one average
game and one bad game. Somehow they still won, but as
Jake Plummer can tell you, wins apparently aren't
enough in Denver. Travis Henry, he of the
$20,000-a-month child support payment (no joke) is the
one shining beacon this year, the kind of workhorse
the Broncos have been missing since Mike Anderson's
best season. Henry, Bly, Lynch, and Bailey had better
continue feeding the Broncos as much as they can,
because this team apparently cannot survive on Pumpkin
Pie alone.
We here at LPP do understand that you can't ask one
man or pastry to carry a team entirely on his own. It
takes a TEAM to win games. However, we can at least
assume fans in Denver will be as fair and impartial as
they've always been, and as long as the team looks
like a playoff contender, they can lay off Pumpkin Pie
and support him. We'd hate to see Pumpkin Pie
struggle through a few more games and then get rattled
as an entire city starts calling for Shanahan to start
Patrick Ramsey over Pumpkin Pie even if the Broncos
have a winning record and a playoff berth
(LetRamseyPlay.com IS an available web domain, isn't
it?) But we understand. It's only fair that this
happens. So suck it up, Pumpkin Pie, and start
contributing heavily to wins! We care about you here
at Let Pumpkin...er, Plummer Play! Don't let the city
of Denver down! They're vicious career killers and
they'd be happy to feast on your sweet tasty innards
if you gave them half a reason.
Oh, who are we kidding. Denver loves Pumpkin Pie.
They aren't going to turn on him...for now. Still, if
wins were all that mattered, you'd have a whole city
screaming at Shanahan to:
LET PLUMMER PLAY!!!
The Broncos are apparently the greatest team in
football. Well, that must be the case right? After
all, great teams win ugly, and these two wins have
been some of the ugliest wins in Broncos history. As
happy as we are to escape with a win today, let's not
start making room for the Lombardi Trophy just yet.
The fact that the Broncos had to ESCAPE with a win IN
MILE HIGH against JOSH MCCLOWN AND THE RAIDERS coupled
with last week's near-disaster against the Bills
should start the sirens blaring. Is this team really
ready for Indianapolis and San Diego in its current
state? Is Jason Elam, the Broncos' most consistent
asset for the past thirteen years, starting to lose
it? Is "Pumpkin Pie" Jay Cutler going to show the
weapons he flashed late in 2007 or is he regressing?
These questions aren't answered yet, luckily. Let's
start with the opponents. Buffalo and Oakland are
supposed to be slightly improved from last year, but
let's face it, they are still two "bottom-five" NFL
teams--perhaps only the Chiefs and Falcons are worse,
although the Saints and Giants seem to have suddenly
degraded to the bottom of the pack as well. Yet the
Raiders not only put up a fight, they had the Broncos
on the ropes and almost got the kill. If Janokowski's
kick is eight inches to the left, the Broncos lose.
Thankfully, Janokowski has become one of the most
inconsistent kickers in the league and did what he
does best after Shanahan's time-out froze him up. But
the Raiders came REAL close at mile high, and let's
not be blinded by Cutler's magical non-touchdown drive
and Elam's kick at the gun The Bills would have won
last week if they hadn't poorly managed the clock.
The Broncos aren't very far removed from an 0-2 start.
But they won both of those games because of Jason
Elam. Or perhaps despite Elam? He missed two big
ones last week and another today in primo kicking
conditions. If he gets over these jitters, then it's
all good, but God forbid the Broncos have to start
worrying about yet another position. We'll give Elam
credit for not shanking the two game-winners, but
then, if he'd made the ones he missed, the games would
never have been on the line to begin with.
So how does Pumpkin Pie figure into all this? Well,
if you can see the name of the website, you know where
we're going here. Once again, the Broncos were forced
to ride the defense to victory. Although 'Dre Bly got
fooled badly by Jerry Porter for a score, the Broncos
held the Raider offense for the most part. Meanwhile,
between a safety and two picks--one turning into the
TD that gave the Raiders a late lead--Pumkpin Pie
single-handedly spotted Oakland nine points and did
little in overtime except let Big Baby Daddy run the
ball down the tired Raiders' throats.
"But we got the win, right?" say the Pumpkin Pie Fans.
Hey, isn't the the kind of game that got the Snake
treated like Osama Bin Plummer? Poor stats and a win
thanks to the D and some pixie dust? Are the
hypocrites going to point to this as some sort of huge
improvement over last season? The Broncos are still
relying too heavily on the secondary to cover up the
front line's mistakes and Cutler has had one average
game and one bad game. Somehow they still won, but as
Jake Plummer can tell you, wins apparently aren't
enough in Denver. Travis Henry, he of the
$20,000-a-month child support payment (no joke) is the
one shining beacon this year, the kind of workhorse
the Broncos have been missing since Mike Anderson's
best season. Henry, Bly, Lynch, and Bailey had better
continue feeding the Broncos as much as they can,
because this team apparently cannot survive on Pumpkin
Pie alone.
We here at LPP do understand that you can't ask one
man or pastry to carry a team entirely on his own. It
takes a TEAM to win games. However, we can at least
assume fans in Denver will be as fair and impartial as
they've always been, and as long as the team looks
like a playoff contender, they can lay off Pumpkin Pie
and support him. We'd hate to see Pumpkin Pie
struggle through a few more games and then get rattled
as an entire city starts calling for Shanahan to start
Patrick Ramsey over Pumpkin Pie even if the Broncos
have a winning record and a playoff berth
(LetRamseyPlay.com IS an available web domain, isn't
it?) But we understand. It's only fair that this
happens. So suck it up, Pumpkin Pie, and start
contributing heavily to wins! We care about you here
at Let Pumpkin...er, Plummer Play! Don't let the city
of Denver down! They're vicious career killers and
they'd be happy to feast on your sweet tasty innards
if you gave them half a reason.
Oh, who are we kidding. Denver loves Pumpkin Pie.
They aren't going to turn on him...for now. Still, if
wins were all that mattered, you'd have a whole city
screaming at Shanahan to:
LET PLUMMER PLAY!!!
3 comments:
Ok first why are you calling Jay Pumkin Pie? Second he is doing a pretty good job for only his 7th game. Third he has over 500 yards this season. Fourth he did REALLY well on third downs today. He had a couple of bad mistakes with Saftey and the one pick that was all his fault but the other was tipped so that wasn't all his fault...lets see the numbers between him and plummer in each of there first 7 games and i bet JAY has the better numbers and record.
To your question: Ok first why are you calling Jay Pumkin Pie?
We promise an answer within the next few days! So keep checking back, it's a funny one!
LPP
If plummer was sooo good then how come he decided to quit when the broncos didn't want him anymore? because of the fact that nobody wanted him because he was the most inconsistent quarterback in the history of the nfl. and don't tell me the john elway won the superbowl by himself because he had the chance with dan reeves, how many superbowls did he go to and not win? but he is 2-0 in superbowl wins with shanahan? yea that must mean he didn't want to win the first 3 times, and then he said o ok i will win now. no no you guys are right coaching had absolutely nothing in the world to do with it. and o by the way what was that awesome record that plummer holds? was it most interceptions in a single season? what is that record that pumpkin pie holds? only rookie to have 4 multiple touchdown pass games in a row? plummer took a shit on the nfl field for 9 years, cutler has had 8 starts and already a better completion rating than plummer. and o by the way listen to elways cbs interview he promises cutler will take the broncos to the superbowl, and if you think elway is the man that you say he is, then I think if I were you I would listen
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