Plummer Plundered

Was "Tampa Bay Fops" already taken?

Well, the underdog gets stomped again. It looks like the Tampa Bay Fake Raiders are going to get a lot of Jake "The Snake" Plummer's signing bonus after all. (Thanks to "grizzly" for the heads-up)

With the matter ready to go to arbitration, it seems apparent that the multi-gazillionaire Glazer crew had our favorite retiree over the barrel, as it were. Jake will be paying the Fake Raiders a pretty huge chunk (roughly half) of the money that Denver included in his contract as a pro-rated bonus. It's nice to know for future reference (any NFL players, pay attention) that apparently a "bonus" is only a bonus when it's in your hand as an extra incentive in the present, not a percentage tied to your actual paycheck that can be taken away in the future. If that's the case, it's not a bonus, it's a salary. And--may we add--it's bogus.

There is a stipulation about Jake still being chained to the Fake Raiders' mast in case he decides to return. Wow, that's great. The Fake Raiders treat guys who want to play for them like crap as it is. I bet Jake would just love to board that rapidly-sinking ship. The Dread Pirate Gruden is probably updating his resume in preparation to scurry out of there with the rats ASAP--leaving the twenty-seven quarterbacks on their roster fighting for the starting job to drown in the mediocrity of the Fake Raiders' forseeable future.

Well, we hope Jake still has enough cash flow to get by, especially since coming back is now even more complicated than before. If not, there's still time to run for office! We'd like to extend our middle fingers to the Tampa Bay Fake Raiders organization for punishing Jake as a result of their own completely idiotic trade for a guy who had already said he didn't want to play for them. So here's to you...

F*** YOU, TAMPA BAY FAKE RAIDERS!!!