4-0!!!

Drink up, Kyle! Your Broncos have opened the season undefeated! Maybe we still aren't 100% sure about Josh McDaniels, but we were obviously right that Shanahan needed to go.

Funny how people seem less excited about this fast start than last year's fast start. Sure, the Broncos haven't beaten a real contender yet. But even though the Cowboys are an overrated shell of a good team (like we correctly predicted the Titans would be even though we were too busy to do a true 2010 Season Predictions column) the shutdown defense on Tony "OVERRATED" Romo was impressive.

The rest of the schedule is a lot tougher, outside of the Chiefs and Raiders rematches. This week? Josh MickeyD gets to take a shot at his old mentor Bill Belichick, which we're FAR more excited about than last night's predictable and sickening Brett Favre circle jerk by ESPN. The Broncos (can't believe we're saying this but it's great to say) have more than just a chance against a vulnerable and rusty-looking Patriots team with a shaky running game, an inconsistent defense, and Tom Brady still only looking like 90% of his former Lord of the Pigskin self.

We think they win on a late FG, with Kyle Orton continuing his stellar ball control. Champ's going to have a much rougher time with Moss than he did with the Cowboy's paper tigers, but the defense is good enough to hold down the Pats, Jets-style, as long as no one falls asleep for that one huge game-changing play the Patriots historically pull out of their asses when they win close games.

Yes, LetPlummerPlay.com is backing the Broncos--like we said we would when things got back on track. Are they Super Bowl-bound? Hold your horses. The Ravens, Steelers, and Colts would tear them up in a playoff game right now, and we haven't seen how they'll face up to the Chargers just yet. But it's a start.

Meanwhile, while the Broncos were proving how much they didn't need Mike Shanahan on Sunday, the Cowboys went out and proved that--wait for it--Dallas needs to shitcan Wade Phillips and hire Shanahan STAT. The Cowboys, despite poor coaching, have a solid base and a talented but directionless quarterback in Tony Romo. He wouldn't make them a Super Bowl winner unless they lucked into another superstar, but Dallas has exactly the kind of pre-made roster Shanahan needs to thrive in this league. Now that he's long gone, it seems to be easier to say that we don't care if he succeeds elsewhere anymore. We know he wasn't the coach to rebuild this (or any) team and so bygones be bygones now, Mike.

On a semi-related note (speaking of QBs with no direction) as much as we hate the Raiders it's sad to see how terrible they're going to continue to be. It's much more fun to beat up on Oakland when the Broncos are actually squashing hopes of success instead of just going through the motions of crushing silver-and-black bugs. JaMarcus Russell has somehow degraded from simply the worst starting quarterback in the league to possibly the worst quarterback in the league PERIOD and maybe the worst since...who, Dan McGwire? But old Zombie Al Davis is going to stand by that big waste of space until the tires come off. Oh well, spilled milk.

Jake Plummer update: Still no comeback. Dammit.

Broncos win, Pumpkin Pie loses, Jake Plummer still retired

It's going to be a busy week in the real world, so sorry, we don't have a good update. But the headline gives you all the important news from week 1, right? Jay Cutler lost some respect points--not for throwing four picks in the Bears loss, but for being wishy-washy about whose fault it was in after the game. Jay, seriously. You had a bad game. Acknowledge it, BEFORE you say "WE need to improve."

Kyle Orton played good enough. Sure, it's the second year in a row we've had to rely on a miracle to beat a bad team, but a win's a win and San Diego once again came out of the gates shaky...maybe 8 wins can win this crappy division, and maybe the Broncos can luck their way into 8 wins.

Oh, and Jake Plummer is still retired, sadly. Still, he's doing well from what we gather and that's what matters.

P.S. to a concerned reader: We don't dislike Pat Bowlen, we're just assholes with really big mouths. Sorry about any of that stuff in the past. Cat Bowlen, on the other hand, we see as more

of a tribute than a poke at Mr. Bowlen, so he stays. If you notice, Cat always speaks truth!

It's just preseason. It's just preseason. It's just preseason.

C'mon Kyle, hit MickeyD with the helmet. You know you want to.

Kyle Orton did what now?

This is too good to be true. Apparently Kyle Orton, he of the NeckBeard, tossed an INT against the Seahawks in this weekend's pre-season game.

Oh, did we forget to mention he did it left-handed?

A lot of so-called Denver "fans" decided to roll their eyes and bring up good old Jake "The Snake" Plummer's infamous lefty interception against the Chiefs and are assuming Orton's pale imitation spells doom for the Broncos this year. We say NAY! (or NEIGH, if you like.) If anything this is a sign of greater things to come for Orton. Sure, his beard is nothing next to Plummer's. We've been through all that. And of course, a lot of critics are saying "Orton's arm strength has been unimpressive." Bah. Arm strength? If you want arm strength, 41-year-old NFL washout Jeff George probably has a stronger arm than 90% of the league's current QBs. We want WINS!

Why does Orton's lefty pick give us hope? Well, for the smartasses who like to reach back and make an unflattering Plummer comparison, let's just set the record straight. After Jake's southpaw INT--including the game in question--all Jake did was post up a record of 23 wins and 13 losses over the next two seasons, including the last Denver playoff victory (against Tom Brady and the Patriots, no less.) If Orton puts up that kind of winning percentage this year it will be the single greatest performance by a Denver QB since John Elway took some terrible offensive rosters into multiple Super Bowls back in the 80s (though the current Denver defense would have to perform some kind of miracle to be as good as the Dan Reeves glory years D.)

So while we still consider Kyle Orton the Lesser Beard, we do at least have a glimmer of hope that he can be successful. While Pumpkin Pie takes his arm strength to Chicago to throw to a bunch of Raider-esque scrub wideouts, Orton can toss to guys like Eddie Royal and Brandon (Why is he still here?) Marshall. We think things will even out, even though we'd really rather be watching the Broncos...

LET PLUMMER PLAY!!!