It's just preseason. It's just preseason. It's just preseason.

C'mon Kyle, hit MickeyD with the helmet. You know you want to.

Brandon Marshall is a whining little baby.

The saga continues for Brandon Marshall. Now he's acting like an immature dick on the field as well as off, and the Denver Broncos are sick of it. They've suspended him indefinitely for the preseason, but will now have even more trouble trading him for anything valuable. B-Marsh's transformation from mere flake to full-on rectal tumor is complete, and few teams really want to inject themselves with cancer like that--especially since Marshall is in his walk year.

The Broncos, knowing they have little chance at Super Bowl glory anyway, are between a rock and a hard place. Trade him for junk? Not an option. They don't want to hand him over to a contender like, say, New England or New York because he'd magically shape up like Randy Moss and eventually, history paints the Broncos as the team that made a terrible, terrible trade.

Suspend him for the season? As much as Denver fans hate a whiner, they hate a losing team far, far more, and benching B-Marsh could bite Josh McDaniels right in his Belichick-cloned ass.

And if they just let Brandon play? Uh...Marshall has already demonstrated the temperament of a nine-year-old who got an old PS2 instead of the Wii he really wanted from Santy Claus. As talented as he may be, sending B-Marsh out to do whatever he feels like doing that Sunday is suicide for a team saddled with Kyle Orton and Chris Simms, who may be competent QB's but aren't miracle workers.

It's going to be a long, strange year for Broncos fans, especially with this drunk-driving, woman-beating, thug-taunting, trade-demanding lil' whiner on board. Considering how things went with Cutler, it's surprising Bowlen hasn't given B-Marsh the same treatment and shipped him out. Or maybe that's exactly why they haven't traded him.

Either way, WOO-HOO! GO BRONCOS! SUPER BOWL BAYBEEEEE!!!

Kyle Orton did what now?

This is too good to be true. Apparently Kyle Orton, he of the NeckBeard, tossed an INT against the Seahawks in this weekend's pre-season game.

Oh, did we forget to mention he did it left-handed?

A lot of so-called Denver "fans" decided to roll their eyes and bring up good old Jake "The Snake" Plummer's infamous lefty interception against the Chiefs and are assuming Orton's pale imitation spells doom for the Broncos this year. We say NAY! (or NEIGH, if you like.) If anything this is a sign of greater things to come for Orton. Sure, his beard is nothing next to Plummer's. We've been through all that. And of course, a lot of critics are saying "Orton's arm strength has been unimpressive." Bah. Arm strength? If you want arm strength, 41-year-old NFL washout Jeff George probably has a stronger arm than 90% of the league's current QBs. We want WINS!

Why does Orton's lefty pick give us hope? Well, for the smartasses who like to reach back and make an unflattering Plummer comparison, let's just set the record straight. After Jake's southpaw INT--including the game in question--all Jake did was post up a record of 23 wins and 13 losses over the next two seasons, including the last Denver playoff victory (against Tom Brady and the Patriots, no less.) If Orton puts up that kind of winning percentage this year it will be the single greatest performance by a Denver QB since John Elway took some terrible offensive rosters into multiple Super Bowls back in the 80s (though the current Denver defense would have to perform some kind of miracle to be as good as the Dan Reeves glory years D.)

So while we still consider Kyle Orton the Lesser Beard, we do at least have a glimmer of hope that he can be successful. While Pumpkin Pie takes his arm strength to Chicago to throw to a bunch of Raider-esque scrub wideouts, Orton can toss to guys like Eddie Royal and Brandon (Why is he still here?) Marshall. We think things will even out, even though we'd really rather be watching the Broncos...

LET PLUMMER PLAY!!!

Cat Bowlen comments on Brett Favre's "surprise" comeback

Pumpkin Pie says Denver fans suck

Jay Cutler wants the world to know that on a scale of 1 to 10, Broncos fans are a "6" and Bears fans are a "9".

Just so you know, John Elway gives Broncos fans a "10".

Brian Griese gives them a "4".

And Jake Plummer?




Uh, Jake says Broncos fans are number one!